Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Sad

Another Mother's Day has come and gone. My son was transported to prison Monday May 5th and is in the intake phase of the process. It says on the Department of Corrections website that new inmates will not have phone/mail privileges for 7-10 days during intake. So, I wasn't expecting any call on Sunday as it was only 7 days at that point.
I am very raw emotionally right now and I seem to cry at the drop of a hat. My daughter took me to a very nice dinner after she was off work. Before she came home, I spent most of the day crying. I realize it isn't as if my son has showered me with affection these past several years but knowing where he is just makes me sad.
This feeling has continued and today as I was having lunch I was reading about LeBron James nearly 50 point game last night. That led me to thinking about the last time I saw my son wearing his Heat jersey. It was at my daughter's graduation party in June 2011. I had noticed he was sitting all by himself at a table and looked entirely lost. That thought of noticing how out of place he looked back then opened the floodgates again.
I did see him in the county jail the Sunday before he left and he looked so good. He has been clean for over 8 months. I pray he continues to serve his time in the most productive way possible and can
get through this phase of his incarceration as well as he did at the county jail. He is a small guy, not a violent person at all and I know that he will have some tough times ahead. Hopefully, he will be brought back for judicial release in a few months. Please keep him in your thoughts.



3 comments:

Dad and Mom said...

Sheri, you are in my thoughts.

Your son is taking the steps he must take even though it is so terribly hard on you. Hopefully he can learn that life can be possible without drugs.

I know right now they are just empty words because I have been there. When we found out our son was in the El Dorado State Penitentiary we were beside ourselves in hurt. But I will say, take care of yourself. Be strong and be healthy. When he is released you want to be in a place where you can help.

Thinking of you.

Annette said...

Sheri, ((((HUG))))
I am thinking about you. It hurts to think of how sad you are. I have been in that "can't stop crying" place. Your heart is broken. This wasn't how it was supposed to go!
However, here we are. Take good care of yourself right now. Prison sometimes leads to good changes. You know where he is, he is being fed 3 meals a day, he is off drugs. Maybe this is part of his process to wholeness. I will be praying for your boy. <3

Summer said...

Oh Sheri, your post just broke my heart. This is the hardest thing, watching our kids travel a path that never should have been. He's safe, though, safer than he would be on the streets getting high. And through all of these consequences could very well come the change he needs to turn his life into something wonderful. I'm going to believe for that...for you and for him and will be praying for you both.